As I’ve started working with more and more clients, I’ve started to notice a pattern.

At some point during the first week or two of our working together, my clients apologise for being all over the place. At first I didn’t give it much thought. But as it keeps happening I’ve been mulling it over to try and figure out what’s behind those apologies.

Here’s what I think.

I think people who run a small business (and perhaps also those who don’t) have convinced themselves that they need to be brilliant at everything. Admitting that they’re not and that they need help takes guts, and my clients have usually gone through that process by the time they contact me.

But then comes the bit where they invite me in to see how things really are. And then they get embarrassed that everything isn’t all ship-shape, and zen-like. And then they start apologising.

In my last blog post I talked about how I came to a realisation that changed everything. I realised that I didn’t enjoy managing people, that I wasn’t any good at it and that trying to be good at it was making me miserable and ill. The solution was simple: stop doing it, and focus on the things I am great at. That’s what I did, and I’ve never felt better!

Today, I’d like to encourage you to stop for a moment and think about your business. Are you spending enough time on the things you love and are great at? Or does running your business feel like a constant battle?

Don’t get me wrong; it’s extremely unlikely that you’re ever going to love every second of your working day and that there won’t be any tasks that make your heart sink. But the key is to find a balance, and to make sure you’re not spending more than 20% of your time feeling ‘meh’.

The first step to redressing the balance is awareness.

Over the last year or so, I have come to realise that we should all be doing more of what we love.

I realise that’s nothing new. There are memes all over the t’interweb telling us that. We know. We get it.

But for me, the “AHA!” moment hit when I did some soul-searching and realised that the reverse is also true. That it’s ok to admit that this thing I’ve been trying to do for the last 5 years…

The thing I’d also done ten years ago and hated…

The thing I tried to do again because I really should be able to do it….

… it’s ok to admit that I’m just not very good at that thing. I really don’t enjoy it. Worse still, it actually makes me ill.

So perhaps for me it’s not so much “do more of what you love”, but more “do less of what causes you crippling anxiety and stress”.

Duh. *Facepalm*

Let me explain.

I have always enjoyed getting stuff done. I take great satisfaction from finding the most efficient way of doing things, whether that be when cooking dinner or coming up with a process for managing a complex higher education admissions system. For me, it’s not just about getting whatever needs doing done to a high standard; it’s also about getting whatever needs doing done as quickly and efficiently as possible.

Until one day, on my way to the kitchen at work (I remember this moment so clearly), I stopped and asked myself: “What is all this rushing actually FOR? Yes, I’m saving a few minutes here and there, but what am I doing with the time I’ve saved?”

I was hit by a realisation so blindingly obvious that I couldn’t understand why it hadn’t occurred to me before.

If you follow me on Facebook, you might be wondering why I post about slowing down so often on a page that’s meant to be about my Virtual Assistant-ness. Let me explain...

There were lots of things about my last 'proper' job that I loved, but when the relentless pressure started to feel.... well...a little too relentless, I decided to make a change. I started my own VA business because I’d had enough of feeling overwhelmed and exhausted.  I made a conscious choice to put my strengths - and my default “let me help you with that” setting - to good use.