Can you really grow your business AND be kind to yourself?

This blog started life as an episode of my podcast, Unfrazzle. You can listen here if you prefer.

I love guesting on other people’s podcasts – quick sidenote if you have a podcast and are looking for guests, do let me know! – and my bio for when hosts introduce me says that I “help people land their ideas in reality, reach more people and make a bigger impact, whilst taking care of everything they’re juggling day-to-day and being kind to themselves along the way.”

But is it really possible to make an impact and grow your business whilst also being kind to yourself?

The short answer is yes.

But because if I left it there that would make this a very short blog – even by my standards – let’s dive into that some more.

What happens when you’re not kind to yourself

So let’s think for a moment about what happens when you’re not kind to yourself; when you’re working all the hours, constantly berating yourself because you didn’t get enough done, comparing yourself with everyone around you and feeling rubbish as a result.

I think we can agree that’s not what kindness looks like, right?

Living your life and running your business from that place has consequences.

When you’re rushing around, working long hours, bouncing around all over the place and feeling frazzled or overwhelmed, it’s impossible to think clearly or make good decisions.

So instead of investing your time on the things that matter, you get caught in the swirl of busy work (often without even realising it).

When you’re beating yourself up for not getting enough done or comparing yourself to everyone else, you start to feel like you’re failing. That you’re not good enough. That there’s something wrong with you. Your self-esteem suffers. Your self-belief suffers. Your confidence suffers. And when those three things are on the floor, it’s impossible to show up with confidence and clarity in your business.

If those patterns continue for too long, it can result in burnout. You might start falling out of love with your business. You might start resenting your clients.

And again, when that’s what’s going on, how can you possible make a bigger impact and grow?

What self-kindness actually looks like in practice

Being kind to yourself whilst also juggling all the things isn’t a nice-to-have. It’s a necessity.

In practice, that looks like….

Taking breaks, even when you’re busy. And even when you’re having a great time doing something that excites you. Your brain does its best problem-solving when you’re doing something else, so breaks are a great way of accidentally stumbling upon creative solutions to problems.

Being kind also looks like celebrating the big things. How often do you achieve something amazing in your business, and then blow straight by it. Moving onto the next thing. Or going straight into thinking about what you could have done better, instead of acknowledging the INCREDIBLE thing you just accomplished?

You’re depriving yourself of so much good stuff when you don’t give yourself space to ENJOY the feeling of having achieved something that a previous version of you could only have dreamed of. So make sure you pause and take a moment to feel all the feels when something amazing happens in your business.

But it’s not just about the big things. Being kind to yourself means celebrating the small things too. In fact I’d argue it’s even more important to celebrate the small things, because that’s what keeps us moving forward. So celebrate every time you do something that feels uncomfortable or hard – asking for a testimonial, or reaching out to offer your service to someone you’d love to work with.

Celebrate every time you feel tired and choose to rest.

Celebrate every time a client tells you they love the work you’re doing.

Noticing all those small things will keep your cup topped up with good vibes, strengthening your belief in yourself as someone who knows what they’re doing, can do hard things, and is doing an incredible job for the people they serve. The more you strengthen those neural pathways, the weaker the less helpful ones will become – the ones that try and convince you you’re not enough. So let’s replace those unkind thoughts with more empowering thoughts and beliefs.

Taking care of Future You

Being kind to yourself also looks like taking care of Future You by writing to-do lists and plans that aren’t going to send them into a tailspin. When you try and cram so much doing into a single day, week or month – when you’re trying to do way too much – you’re creating a problem that Future You is going to have to deal with. Either by working themselves into the ground, or feeling like a failure when they don’t get it all done. Or both.

What if Today You could be kind to Future You, by not giving them more than they can handle?

I know that’s easier said than done, but that’s essentially what we do together in Make It Happen Club. When you create plans with me, I make sure that Today You is not creating a mess for Future You to deal with. When you make your plans thoughtfully, and give them room to breathe, you’re setting Future You up for greatness.

Being kind to yourself is the secret to your success

All those things – taking breaks, celebrating, making achievable, spacious plans - WILL help you make a bigger impact, because they’ll boost your resilience and your confidence, as well as your productivity. You’ll see yourself making progress which will expand your sense of what’s possible. And from there? The sky’s the limit!

So what one thing can you do today to be kind to yourself, so you can make an impact and grow your business?

And what can you do tomorrow?

As always, I hope that this helps and look forward to seeing you again soon.