Five reasons why it's hard to pause and plan on your own
I’m often asked what people should do when they’re deep in overwhelm, with too much on their plate and a to-do list whirling around in their head like a Tasmanian Devil.
My answer? Pause. Take a break. Slow down. You know, all those counterintuitive things that settle your nervous system so you can think more clearly and make better decisions. Then, to help you feel calm and in control when you're ready to pick things up again, I suggest a little gentle planning to make sure you're investing your time in what's most important.
Imagine how different things might be if, instead of waiting until you’re at your wits end, you were to take a purposeful pause for powerful planning every single month, so you can stay focused on what’s most important and head off any potential overwhelm before it gets its claws in. Wouldn’t that be something?
Whenever I share this advice, I see the penny drop. There’s a palpable feeling of relief as people realise how simple it can be. “All I need to do is pause. Easy! I can do that!”
And it’s true!
Of course you can take that pause for powerful planning.
But left to your own devices, will you?
It sounds simple in theory, but actually putting it into practice – not just once, but consistently – is a very different matter.
So why do so many people stay stuck in the swirl of overwhelm when they know intellectually that taking a regular pause would make everything so much easier?
Well, here are the five most common reasons that smart, savvy business owners just like you find it hard to pause and plan consistently on their own.
1. You tell yourself it’s a luxury you can’t afford
You’re so busy, always rushing from one thing to the next. What with client delivery, content to create, socials to keep an eye on, emails to stay on top of, keeping your kids fed, watered and in the right place at the right time, proposals to write, workshops to prep, networking contacts to follow up with … there’s barely time to drink a cup of tea before it gets cold, let alone time to pause and plan. So you just keep your head down and get on with things.
The trouble is, it’s precisely because you don’t have time that you need to make time to pause and plan. How else will you check in to make sure you’re not wasting your precious time on things that don’t actually matter, or that someone else could help you with? How do you make sure you’re not frittering your time away on busy work?
2. Pausing to plan never makes it to the top of your list
When you’re in the trenches growing your business, there’s always something more important to be doing. Something that feels like a higher priority than pausing and planning. You might be thinking, “when I achieve X, then I’ll be able to pause”. But let’s be honest - when you’re an ambitious business owner with loads of great ideas, there’ll always be something new and exciting to aim for. So if you’re waiting to get ‘there’ before giving yourself permission to pause, you’ll be waiting a very long time! Which means you’ll carry on flying by the seat of your pants and getting in a last-minute panic ad infinitum.
What if putting planning at the top of your list would help you get the important things done with greater ease, so you know everything is under control?
3. You’re too excited!
When a new idea hits, or you get a sudden flash of inspiration around you strategy or a direction you want to go in, you just want to crack on! You’re desperate to harness that excitement and unleash your fabulousness, so you dive in with both feet. Surely that’s a good thing, right? It means you’re moving into action rather than staying stuck?
Well, yes and no. Of course it’s fabulous that you’re so excited to get going. But have you checked in with your capacity? Do you know what time and space is available to you to get this done? Have you got clarity around what needs to happen and in what order for this to be a success?
What if, instead of diving straight in, you took a pause and used that pause to feel the excitement, connect with your motivation AND create a plan to help you keep the momentum going without getting overwhelmed in the process? In my world, pausing to plan doesn’t mean leaving your creativity and excitement at the door. Those are the very things that make your plans succeed!
4. The novelty wears off
You love the idea of slowing down and taking a pause for powerful planning. You can imagine the difference it’ll make in your life, so you give it a go. Over the next few days, perhaps even weeks, you allow yourself to pause and plan, giving yourself space to think and make intentional choices about how to invest your time, energy and attention. It feels great, and those feelings of calm and control stay with you for a while.
But here’s the thing: there’s a good chance the novelty will wear off. Not because it’s not working, but because you’re trying to do it on your own. Things get busy, life gets in the way, and with nobody looking over your shoulder, you fall back into your old patterns. It’s a bit like coming home from a really relaxing holiday. You’re determined to hold onto those zen-like feelings of calm, but then reality hits and all your good intentions go out the window!
5. You’re just not wired that way
Not enough people are talking about this, but I believe it’s one of the biggest reasons so many people find it so goshdarn difficult to pause and plan on their own so today I’m going there!
You know those well-meaning people who tell you all you need to do is put the important things in your diary every month and then all your problems will be solved? Their advice works great if you’re the kind of person who does what your diary tells you to do. But the truth is, those people are pretty rare.
Gretchen Rubin’s Four Tendencies framework recognises that not all humans are the same when it comes to meeting expectations and getting things done. There’s one group of people, Upholders, who will always, without fail, do what their calendar tells them to do. But in researching her framework, Gretchen found that just 19% of those studied fall into the Upholder category.
So if you’ve tried to pause and plan on your own but you find it hard to follow through with those good intentions, take heart! You’re actually in the majority. You see, even when we KNOW that taking regular time out to pause, reflect and plan will help us avoid overwhelm and stay focused on what’s most important, for 81% of us it just isn’t that simple.
The trouble is, many Upholders don’t realise that not everyone functions in the same way as they do. They believe they’ve found what works and they genuinely want to help the rest of us, so they shout their solutions from the rooftops. The result? Those of us in the 81% think there must be something wrong with us when what works for them doesn’t work for us.
If you understand how important it is to slow down and pause but you’re struggling to implement that on your own, I’m here to tell you that there’s nothing wrong with you and you don’t need fixing. You simply haven’t found the approach that’s right for you yet.
Over to you!
One of my private clients once said about planning, “it’s not that I can’t do it on my own, it’s that I don’t”. If you know it would serve you and your business to pause and plan consistently but you’re just not making that happen, I invite you to get curious. Which of the five reasons above resonates for you the most? I hope you can see that there’s absolutely no reason to be embarrassed if you’re finding it a struggle. If you’ve tried going it alone and it’s still not working, maybe it’s time to ask for help.
Next steps
If going solo isn’t working for you and you’re ready to explore the possibility of receiving support, let’s talk! I’d love to help you find a way of getting things done that works for you, so click here to get in touch.